BURNOUT AND ME....

You know what, now I look back, I have been through phases of burnout my whole life!
I worked in a dog kennels for a year and I absolutely LOVED it. I gave it my absolute all. I worked early hours, late evenings, last checks at midnight. Wrote out SOP's in detail, made sure every dog felt welcomed and loved for their stay, bathed them, cuddled with them, sent the owners updates and cleaned those kennel blocks and surrounding areas until they shon. Then one day I felt like a plug had been pulled from my energy and I wanted to get out asap. I quit the next week.

Then moved on to Vet Nursing. Scoured practices nearish to me, rang them, sent in CV's. Dodged the GCSE maths question as I knew I didn't have it and wasn't exactly qualified for the role. Got offered a job. Went to night school to pass my maths GCSE (snuck a calculator in to help me on my mission...but we won't mention that). I qualified, lived breathed, LOVED vet nursing. I studied hard to get my Emergency & Critical Care certifications whilst being pregnant and passing the exams when Isabelle was just 4 months old. Then realised I didn't want that life anymore either.....and quit that too.

Then I poured my heart and soul in to being the perfect mum....Isabelle was the perfect baby! Slept, ate, giggled, smiled, all the things. Then I had Ed. My god that child changed my life (in the best way! Or I would still be a massive knob who thought breast was best and I was the perfect parent). I went from thinking I had parenting nailed, to drowning. I burnt out then too. During Covid so no one saw. I spiralled. I was so stressed and so angry!!!

All through these stages of my life I have picked up my camera, whilst I was a Vet Nurse in Tunbridge Wells I was doing family shoots in Dunorlan park at the weekends! At the Kennels I was photographing the dogs. I learnt my camera inside out with Isabelle, sat in a field for 6 hours fiddling, throwing it (camera), and trying again.
The Life Narrator has always been there (in various forms and names!) My calm. The thing that slowed me down and grounded me. It has literally helped me process the world around me.

The Life Narrator. Something I built from nothing and truly LOVE like a fourth child. Burnt me out. Because I was trying to please everyone. Not offend anyone. Sand down my sometimes rough edges! Show up how I thought a business owner should. The pressure to always be busy and never say no.

I am wrapping this up promise!

Then the AUDHD diagnosis....

I looked back through my whole life. The times I would flip out and sob uncontrollably for hours until I fell asleep, unable to calm myself down, hurt myself, burn out, loose friendships because I couldn't keep up with the social expectations, dread any kind of holiday occasion where family would get together, not because I don't love my family, but I find it so hard to regulate myself surrounded by people.

Anddddd I have forgiven myself and accepted myself. I work with me now. I know I will need a break after anything involving lots of people. I don't pack out my diary. I work with people that fill my cup. I say no to those who drain it (socially and in business!). My life is finally, 37 years in, aligned with me. And I am so excited for what is to come.

If you read all of that message me as I feel like you deserve a bloody medal!!!!!!

Now I am passionate about helping others find themselves through my work. Not necessarily because they have autism, as I think my story applies to humans in general. I want to empower you to be you. Wear the dress, take the trip, say no! Show up as you in your life and in your business.

Because I lived my whole life wishing I could.